House on Haunted Hill (1959)
Vincent Price, Carol Ohmart, Richard Long, Alan Marshal, Carolyn Craig, Elisha Cook, Julie Mitchum
Budget $200,000 Box Office $1.5M
IMDb 6.9/10 Rotten Tomatoes 92% Metacritic NO DATA
This is an old classic horror film from the late 50s. The one and only Vincent Price graces us with a chilling and stellar performance as a cold and calculating husband and host. But let me not get ahead of myself. Let me introduce you to everyone.
Meet Frederick Loren. An interesting fellow and the host of tonight’s little gathering. He’s married to a beautiful woman, has more money than he knows what to do with, he has his health and friends and yet he seems consumed with contempt and displeasure, perhaps even hate.
Annabelle Loren. Frederick’s beloved, although you wouldn’t know it by the way they talk to each other. They have a cold and distasteful yet witty banter between them that makes it clear they are not in love anymore. She is sure he is trying to get rid of her in one way or another.
Together they are to be hosting a dinner party at a haunted house that Frederick has rented for the night. Inviting a specific group of carefully selected guests, Mr. Loren offers $10,000 to whoever can stay the whole night in the house. It’s just that simple. $10,000 for one night in a haunted house. So, let’s meet the special guests, yes?
Mr. Loren thought it a novel and fitting idea to have the guests arrive in funeral cars in funeral procession, an irony lost on all those attending the party I guess.
First, we have Lance Schroeder. Lance is a handsome and strapping test pilot and well, he says he needs the money.
Then there’s Ruth Bridges. Ruth is a columnist at a popular newspaper and she’s a very successful one. She’s also a compulsive gambler. She’s not so successful at that. She needs this money to no doubt pay gambling debts.
Then there's Mr. Watson Pritchard. Pritchard is actually the owner of the so-called haunted house. He’s terrified of this house. But he too is in desperate need for money. He claims a number of people have been murdered there including his own brother.
Next, we have Dr. David Trent. A pompous and greedy psychiatrist, he claims he is staying the night in the house as part of an ongoing study he is conducting on the subject of hysteria. He’s really just there for the money, like the rest of them.
And last, sweet and innocent little Nora Manning. Nora works for one of Mr. Loren’s companies. He hand-selected her specifically because of her home situation, she is the only one that is supporting a large family and needs the $10,000 more than any of the other people invited.
Loren explains that they are all there to spend the night. If they do so, they will receive $10,000. Once the housekeeping staff leaves for the night the doors will be locked from the outside. They will not be able to be opened again until 8am the next morning. They will not be forced to stay; they can leave anytime they choose up until the doors are locked. There are bars on the windows. The only way out is through the front door in the morning.
So, while they are letting this all marinate in their brains they have dinner. (I don’t know that I would eat food that came from someone who just told me all that but okay, whatever.) Then, strange things start to happen and Nora starts to get scared. She decides she wants to leave.
And as Frederick is telling everyone the time is drawing near and their decision needs to be made, they hear the slam of the front door and the haunting final sound of the lock. Now, the choice has been made for ALL of them.
So, now it’s just a matter of time, a matter of waiting and staying alive until dawn.
I loved this movie. I would have loved it in the 50s and I love it now. I can definitely see why it was such a hit at the time. I mean, how can you not love Vincent Price? The man is just awesome!! That voice, that stoic face. Perfect!
Throughout the whole film you know the house isn’t haunted but you also know something is amiss. They do a great job of leading you in and in the 50s, there would have been some very good jump scares. I even noticed things in the film that were used in the movie Clue. There were definitely similarities. It’s like Clue “sampled” this film for some of its ideas.
Carolyn Craig, the gal that played Nora, has a great horror scream too. She really belts it out and lets it go just like Janet Leigh and Jamie Lee Curtis. In old movies like this, I think the scream is so important. They didn’t have all the CGI and special effects we have now. So, that scream had to be blood curdling, absolutely chilling. And she has it down pat in this film.
One of the more interesting and fun facts about this film is that while it was being played in theaters, some theaters participated in something called “Emergo”. This was a little idea that the director Castle cooked up.
In the theater they rigged a very intense and elaborate pulley system so that at a certain point in the film, a skeleton could swoop down and fly over the heads of the audience, scaring the crap out of them. It ended up being a mechanical and logistical nightmare BUT, it did help make the movie a box office success, which was the whole point. The $1.5 million it made at the box office in 1959 would be almost $9 million today. In today’s terms it cost $1.7 million to make. So, they profited about $7 million. That’s not bad for the 1950s.
In 1999 there was a remake done that was ultimately successful. I haven’t seen it yet. I also read that there was a sequel to THAT remake make in 2007 and I saw online that another remake is in development as of 2017. (You’d think Hollywood could maybe come up with a new idea on their own instead of just remaking every movie that’s ever been made.)
If you get a chance I really would recommend any horror fan watching this if you haven’t already. If you are absolutely opposed to black and white, I believe they even have an “in-color” version out there.
Range Runners (2019)
Directed by Philip S. Plowden
Written by Devon Colwell
Produced by Christian Crocker, RoseMary Prodonovich, Christopher Ganze
Starring: Celeste M. Cooper, Sean Patrick Leonard, Michael B. Woods
I got the opportunity to view this film a few nights ago although it premiered at the opening night of the Artemis Women in Action Film Festival April 26th. It happens to be the headline film for the night as the Feature Narrative. Another fantastic little tidbit of information that, to me, is no small feat is that the production company, Fatal Funnel Films, was founded by the film’s director/executive producer Philip S. Plowden and writer/executive producer Devon Colwell. I think that is really cool because the struggle from starting at the bottom and rising to seeing your dreams come to fruition is a constant theme throughout this whole film.
Range Runners is truly a moving story. It is a psychological thriller set in the heavily wooded area of a 2,200-mile-long hiking trail. Her goal is to make it all the way through this trail on her own, alone, with nothing but her pack on her back and her physical and mental strength to push her through. It strikes me as the kind of personal challenge one would undertake if they were struggling with a lot not only in life but, within themselves.
Mel (Celeste M. Cooper) is no exception. This gal is one tough spirit to be reckoned with. Yet, she is battling her own demons within her soul, trying to prove certain things to herself and to the ghosts of her life that seem to live in her thoughts, haunting her mind.
Mel is well prepared for this journey and has all the skills needed to survive while she makes her trek through the next 2,200 miles of her life. But things take a strange and twisted turn when she finds she is not alone on this trail like she thought she would be. Normally, even day hikers, as these two Deliverancelooking jokers claim to be, have backpacks, water bottles, hiking boots, you know, the typical gear. These shmoes don’t have anything but a blue backpack. A regular backpack like a 4thgrader uses, nothing fancy. It’s not a hiking pack with a bedroll or anything like what Mel is running with. Oh and she IS running this whole way, she takes breaks and such but, she’s definitely beating her feet like she’s running toward something or running away from something, even before she meets these two Grizzly Adams lookin’ bozos.
She is immediately suspicious and tries to put some distance between them and her. Eventually, she finds a shelter and decides to camp there for the night. When she wakes up in the morning…that’s when things take a whole new turn.
And that is all I am going to tell you.
I really liked this film. I thought they did an amazing job and although I wouldn’t necessarily classify it as horror, it definitely has the psychological aspect down. Throughout the whole film there is a sense of foreboding, a sense of ever-present unrest and uneasiness, as the film progresses on. It’s so heavy you almost start to feel a little uncomfortable, like you want to adjust in your seat or give yourself a few self-soothing touch gestures like wrap your arms around yourself or start gently rocking yourself.
It is also extremely easy to identify with Mel, at least for me. I do think that a lot of women will find it easy to relate to her character but I don’t think it’s going to be a requirement that one be female in order to find some common ground with her. I think the journey Mel goes on within herself, testing not only her personal physical limits but her psychological and emotional limits, does make this a thriller and a somewhat edge of your seat kind of movie, if you think about it in terms of the mental aspect of it.
Even though there is an entire thriller aspect of a stalking kind of sorts, it’s not exactly how you think it’s going to be. And I think this movie is meant to make you think much more than it is meant to make you feel creeped out. I think they accomplished just that. And at the end, Mel wasn’t the only one who felt like she had been on a journey and had that feeling of pride and accomplishment.
Knock, Knock (2015)
Directed by Eli Roth
Written by Eli Roth, Guillermo Amoedo, Nicolâs Lôpez
Keanu Reeves, Ana de Armas, Lorenza Izzo, Aaron Burns,
Ignacia Allamand, Colleen Camp
Budget $2M Box Office $6.3M
IMDb 5.6/10 Rotten Tomatoes 36% Metacritic 53/100
As most of you probably already know, I don’t usually agree with the genius and super-qualified folks at Rotten Tomatoes (if you read that with sarcasm, that’s okay with me). I don’t know what kind of credentials you have to have to be an actual “critic” as opposed to just one of us lowly “viewers” on that site but, let’s face it, those wise and educated few just don’t have a taste for horror on any level. Therefore, yet again, we seem to disagree on the entertainment value of this film.
I found the whole idea behind the general plot to this movie absolutely, without a doubt, 100% entertaining. I think most women would. On the flip side of that, I think that it would equally scare the crap out of most men, at least in the way of a quick thought zipping through the mind.
One of the oldest clichés in the history of sex between men and women is the legendary fantasy of one man and two women. Even greater than that would be some sort of outrageously fortuitous situation where say, two sexy chicks with great bodies knocked on the front door one rainy night in need of assistance. (Does that sound like a horrible porn scene set up or what?!?!) Of course, any sane and single man would answer the door, let these lovely and needy respectable ladies in, have the time of his life and then, in the morning, write to Penthouse Forum and tell them all about it (Do men still do that? Does Penthouse still take written letters like that? Or is it just straight to the social media with pics and video now? I know. I’m behind in the times, I admit it and I don’t care. But writing to Penthouse used to be the big joke about stuff like that. Okay, history lesson over and moving onto this century…)
In this film, we have Evan Webber. A successful architect recovering from shoulder surgery. Evan is married to an enthusiastic gallery artist, Karen. Together, they live with their two young children in a modern house that is full of family photos and peculiar and gaudy pieces of art (so not my taste but, I’m sure it appeals to some), thanks to the artistic talents of the wife. We happen to meet the family on Father’s Day weekend. Karen and the kids are going to the beach house for the weekend. Unfortunately, Evan has to stay home for a physical therapy appointment and to finish a work project.
So, Evan sees the family off and gets to work. Later, he stops to take a break and smoke some weed. He loads his bowl and is about to light it (with his Zippo, eye roll please) and he hears someone at his door.
When he opens the door, he sees the epitome of what most men would describe as the beginning of a fantastic freakin’ night. Two chicks, look to be very early twenties, skimpy clothes that are soaking wet and clingy to their bodies. After a little awkwardness and a few smiles they explain that their cab just dropped them off and they are looking for a particular house that is supposed to be having a party. He explains he doesn’t know where the people by that name live but, they are welcome to come in and use his phone. (Of course they are.)
Instead, they ask if they can come in and use his computer to get on their Facebook to get the address of the party. One girl, Genesis, says her phone got wet and won’t work now and the other girl, Bel, apparently left her phone at the supposed house. So, Evan, being the nice guy that he is, allows them to come in and gets them each a towel and hands them and iPad. (Does it not seem like a red flag to anyone else that these chicks want to use a computer and not just a phone? I’m sorry but I’m not letting some stranger come in my house and get on my computer. Hello dumbass???)
So, they come in and use the iPad. They figure out that the cabbie misunderstood the street name they said and that they are way out of their way. Once again, Evan to the rescue and nice guy orders them an Uber. The only catch is that because of the killer rain outside, it’s going to be about 45 minutes until the car gets there. You can tell this makes Evan a little uneasy but, it’s okay. He’ll just mingle and entertain his new guests for a little bit until their ride arrives.
But then the girls ask if they can put their soaking clothes in the dryer. (Are you kidding??? NO!!!) They say they don’t want to show up to the party all wet. Evan can’t seem to help himself, he says yes and gets them some spare bathrobes to put on. They bring him their clothes and he hands them cups of tea (or coffee) while he goes to the dryer.
Then he has no choice but to sit and chat. And chat they do. These girls are very open…about everything. They mostly want to talk about sex. They are obviously trying to get his brain on that track of thinking. And poor Evan. He’s doing his very best to remain faithful and be a good husband. He changes the subject and tries to brush off their blatant flirting. But, this guy is being seriously double-teamed. And these girls are relentless.
As minutes tick by, the girls get more brazen. Eventually, Genesis asks to use the bathroom. While she is in there, Bel makes her move on Evan, who is barely keeping his wits about him at this point. And just when he thinks all hope for self-control is lost, the Uber driver messages to let him know he’s there. Bel says she’ll go get Genesis and Evan thankfully says he’ll go grab their clothes.
But, when he gets to the bathroom, he can hear the girls laughing…and they won’t answer him or open the door. Finally, he gets annoyed and he opens the door to give them their clothes. There, he finds them completely naked, in the tub AND the shower (they are separate, it’s a nice bathroom) and they are all soaped up and ready to go for him. He asks them to get dressed. Then he tells them to get dressed. They refuse. They start to taunt him, kissing him, pawing all over him, until he can no longer resist. And then it’s on like Donkey Kong.
After a wild and crazy night of unadulterated debauchery, he wakes to find his bedroom and bathroom empty. He seems relieved, thinking the girls are gone (thank God) and then he looks at his phone, realizing he has missed messages from his wife. He quickly responds and then goes downstairs. He gets to the kitchen and finds both girls still there, in the robes, in his kitchen, well what’s left of his kitchen. These girls clearly skipped taking Home-Ec in school (if they even went to school). The kitchen looks like a cyclone hit it. (I’ve seen 5 year olds cook that don’t make messes that big.) They are also feeding the family dog (an incredibly adorable little black dog, I have no idea what kind) human food, which is obviously a big no-no. As Evan expresses his desire for them to leave they start to become very evasive and defiant. They begin to act like small children. Evan begins to get frustrated and eventually threatens to call the police.
This is when things really start to get weird. And bad. Very bad. When he dials 911, Genesis tells him that she and Bel are underage and that he had sex with minors, therefore he’s a pedophile and that the cops would probably be very interested in that. So, Evan hangs up. He recalls to her that the night before, they had told him they were flight attendants and traveled the world and blah blah blah. Genesis says none of it was true and now he’s basically screwed.
This is where their whole attitude changes and thus begins a long, semi-combative confrontation about whether or not these girls are going to leave, who out of the three is the whore (he offered them money to leave everything alone and just go away) and they start to destroy his wife’s artwork around the house, doodling on certain pieces with Sharpie marker. At one point, his physical therapist even comes to the door and Genesis, who he told to stay out of sight, comes up behind him and makes it known that she is there for HIS pleasure. The therapist has a hissy fit and takes off.
Evan finally gets to a point where he’s had enough and calls the police, reporting a break in. Genesis hangs up the phone on him (it’s a real landline phone) and asks if he can drive them. He drops them at a house and speeds off, he doesn’t see that they never go inside the home. Evan heads back home and now has the pleasant task of cleaning up the horrible mess these two whack jobs made in his house. Then, he goes back to work, hoping to forget about his bad decision, the horrible morning after and the regrets that followed.
Once again, while he’s working he hears something downstairs. So, he goes to investigate. (Apparently, he’s never watched a horror movie.) Downstairs he finds a family portrait photo on the floor, broken. Just as worry and panic starts to hit him, something hard hits him over the head.
He wakes to find himself tied to his bed and Genesis riffling through Karen’s makeup, doing some sort of psycho Cruella Deville look with her eye shadow. Now, we get into the realm of disturbing, folks. Bel comes in wearing one of Evan’s daughter’s school uniforms. It looks like the typical Catholic school uniform. Evan is livid and demands she take it off. Bel loosely interprets that as he wants her to get on top of him and remove her underwear, so that’s what she does.
Then, she starts going on and on about how much she loves Evan, calling him Daddy an unhealthy number of times and in a VERY unhealthy manner. She starts recalling to him the first time she was molested by her father as if HE was her father. She’s talking to him like he’s her Dad and she’s saying she’s sorry for what she did to Mommy but she wanted them to be together. All kinds of twisted and sick stuff, I’m not kidding. If by this time in the movie you thought these girls had issues, here you realize they are so beyond issues, I don’t even know what the mental health profession would call it besides psychopathic.
As she is blathering on about love and Evan, she is making it known she wants to have sex. Evan makes it known he does not want to have sex. But, just then, his wife calls on FaceTime and he is forced to make a decision. He can either bend to Bel’s will and do what she says OR they can answer the FaceTime call with his pants down and the two of them on screen. He opts for option one. So, while Bel is on top of him getting her way, Genesis starts to record the act on HIS phone, props it on the dresser and leaves to go get something to eat.
During this round of romping, Evan is able to get a hand free and uses it to connect with Bel’s face with enough force to launch her off of him and send her to the floor. He frees the rest of his limbs and takes off down the hall while Bel is laying on the floor holding her cheek and making the oddest puppy whimpering whining sound I have ever come out of a human being.
As he heads down the hallway, he sees Genesis about to munch on a piece of chocolate cake while in one of his wife’s dresses. He yells at her and rushes her, knocking her down. They struggle but, Genesis quickly gets the upper hand when she stabs Evan in his recovering shoulder right in his surgical scar (if you’ve never had fresh scar tissue severed, it’s very painful). He passes out from the pain right after Bel comes and lets him know that they have to punish him for hitting her.
This time when he wakes up he is tied to a chair. Genesis and Bel are both in fancier clothes and Genesis is acting out the part of game show host for her game “Who Wants to be a Pedophile?” In this game, Genesis asks Evan questions and if he answers wrong or she doesn’t like his answers, they put headphones on him and blast his ears with a horrific high pitched static like screeching noise that he screams will make him go deaf.
By the time we get to question two, “How many family men have survived this game?”, it becomes painfully obvious that these two are serial killers and have no intention of leaving him alive. But, the horror is truly just beginning.
Now, as much as I REALLY want to tell you all what happens, I don’t want to ruin anything. And this movie didn’t come out all that long ago so, I definitely don’t want to give anything away. It’s not like this film is decades old like some other ones I have reviewed.
I really liked this movie. I thought it was totally hysterical how the whole “every guy’s fantasy” turned out to go completely awry for this guy. You do start to feel bad for him though. I mean, he really did try to get them to leave before they practically glued their moved to his johnson. I guess a guy can only refuse so much.
There were certainly parts of the story that I found nothing short of absolutely disturbing. That chick Bel, she’s wicked obsessed with her pedophilic father. This girl’s love map is violently skewed off course. So is Genesis’s love map. These girls seem to see themselves as some sort of pedophile victim vigilantes.
There was one point in the film where they show these two pop-tarts digging a grave in the backyard. I’m supposed to believe that these two twisted twits are able to dig a full size grave that is over two feet deep and at least three feet wide by oh, five feet long in less than two hours and that they did it with absolute ease?!?!?! Not even!!!! These two chicks probably couldn’t dig that in two days let alone two hours…look at their arms! I highly doubt that these two psychotic clowns have an easier time digging a grave than most men. (Even in Goodfellasthere were three of them and it took them all night to bury a body.)
There’s also another part where I guess I am expected to believe that these two chippies are able to lift over 200lbs of dead weight and hall it up to waist level to put it into the back of a van. Not happening. Even if they were on steroids and PCP, not happening.
Other than those few unlikely details, I liked this movie a lot. I found it funny, quick moving and there were even things that surprised me. It’s not all predictable. There are also some serious WOW moments where you are like “Damn! That’s messed up!”
I did find the girls just a tiny bit annoying at a couple various points in the movie but I think that goes with the psychological profile they were trying to portray in the story. I feel that the women did a pretty damn good job at playing a couple of nutty and whacked out misguided abuse victims who have lost touch with reality and the line between right and wrong. I would definitely recommend this to horror fans but, mostly to the fans of psychological thrillers and mind-twist kind of movies.
Happy Birthday To Me (1981)
J. Lee Thompson
Timothy Bond, Peter Jobin, John Saxton, John Beaird
Melissa Sue Anderson, Glenn Ford, Lawrence Dane, Sharon Acker, Frances Hyland, Tracey Bregman, Lisa Langlois
Budget $2.5M Box Office $10.6M
IMDb 6.1/10 Rotten Tomatoes 27% Metacritic 24/100
So, after watching this film, I have tried and tried to think of how I am going to sum it up for you guys and I gotta tell ya, I can’t. It is truly so all over the place that you’re just better off watching it, if you want to. But, here’s what I AM gonna tell you…
This film received negative reviews upon release and still somehow managed to make over four times its budget at the box office. It also has still developed a serious cult following which, after viewing, I can kinda get. There ARE some scenes that, for the era, it doesn’t surprise me they are considered some classic scenes.
I will say that this movie was one of the films banned during the “Video Nasty” panic in the 1980s in the United Kingdom where there was a huge controversy about violent movies, the ease of their availability and the effect they were having on young people. Eventually, people calmed down and everyone came to an agreement but, the debate will always remain, as it does here in the States.
Also, if everything feels like it doesn’t quite fit together, don’t feel bad. It’s not just you. It’s because the ending you see in the film is not the original ending that was planned before production started. The first ending was thought to be not climatic enough, the horror movie industry just coming off Friday the 13thand Prom Night. So, they decided to change it.
Now, while I feel like they could have gotten the same movie done in less time, I think they did pretty good for it being from 1981. I will admit there was a lot of needless POV walking shots, downtime that seemed pointless, that sort of thing. I don’t know if they were trying to use up the budget or pad the budget or lengthen the film or what. But, I don’t think all of it was needed.
Plus, while some of the kill scenes were creative, the amount of blood was exaggerated for the method of death. I mean, road rash from a motorcycle tire doesn’t spew gallons of blood. Just saying. However, you all know how much I love the gore so, splatter on blood hounds!!!!
Quicksilver Highway (1997)
Based on Clive Barker’s The Body Politic and Stephen King’s Chattery Teeth
Starring: Christopher Lloyd, Matt Frewer, Raphael Sbarge
Budget $4M Box Office N/A
IMDb 4.9/10 Rotten Tomatoes N/A Metacritic N/A
This film had a nice Creepshow,Tales from the Darksidekind of feel to it. While this film doesn’t quite qualify as an anthology (there’s only two stories) it still has that anthology quality that makes it feel like a couple cozy little campfire bedtime stories.
In this movie, we have a constant character in Quicksilver, played by Christopher Lloyd. He introduces himself as a collector. In his own words, “a collector of stories and tales, seeking to view and collect for humanity, the darkness of the country.” (What a philanthropist!)
So, we have two tales in this film. The first is based off of a Stephen King story called Chattery Teeth. The second is based off a story from Clive Barker called The Body Politic. I liked both stories in this movie. I vaguely remembering reading Chattery Teethyears ago when I travelled for work. I think I read it while sitting at an airport waiting for a flight. The Clive Barker story I’ve never heard of until this movie.
Our first story is basically about a salesman, Bill Hogan. Bill is trying to get home in time for his son’s birthday that night. However, a serious windstorm is impeding his progress. The wind is so hardcore it’s hard to even see the road right in front of him, let alone the hitchhiker on the side of the road that he almost flattens. He decides he should pull over at a diner. While he’s there he sees a set of novelty chatter teeth and decides to buy them for his son for his birthday. These teeth are way bigger than the tiny fit-in-your-palm sized ones we are used to seeing. This particular set are at least as tall as a can of soda and and probably a good six inches wide. They actually remind me of one of those huge models of the mouth that dentists used to have in their offices. He also sees the hitchhiker he damn near killed trying to buy a pack of cigarettes but he’s short some change. The salesman gives him enough money to complete his purchase. As Bill is leaving the hitchhiker, Bryan Adams (I know, it’s hysterical) asks for a ride. Bill reluctantly agrees.
Now, Bill is kind of an ass. He’s very tense, he’s got anger issues. He’s wound tighter than a snare drum. Apparently, he’s been having problems at home AND he’s a reformed smoker. Bryan Adams, our friendly roadside rambler, is an artist, an asshole and a smoker. Just by what I have told you, do YOU think these two should be road-trippin’ it together???
Anyway, things between these two fellas go awry and the chattery teeth, belonging to Bill, intervene on his behalf in a very interesting way. I’ll let you find out how.
Let’s motor on along to story two. (Yes, I said motor. Gen Xers know what I’m talking about. Showing age again, so…moving on.)
Here we meet Charlie. A sneaky little pickpocket at a carnival that darts into a “Tent of Horrors” in order to avoid detection. While in this tent, he not only takes the time to look around and eyeball something labeled “The Hand of Glory”, he also meets Quicksilver, who yet again espouses himself as a collector and gives Charlie the schpeel.
Then, they start discussing this “Hand of Glory” thing. Basically, it is a dried and pickled hand of a man who has been hanged. It is used as a protective device, having been dipped in the dead criminal’s body fat and made into a candle. (Whoa! Talk about some morbid wicked stuff! And I bet that candle smells nasty as hell when it’s lit, eeewww!) So, Quicksilver offers up a quick little tale.
Enter Dr. George, an arrogant and greedy plastic surgeon whose living is made from his hands and his life is nothing but dollar signs. This is a doctor of questionable morality as it is clear he performs surgeries that every other reputable doctor would turn down. No risk is too great and no reward high enough to satisfy his need for wealth and extravagance.
And life, for the most part, is pretty normal (I know, it’s a relative term) for this surgeon. Until one night when he discovers his hands have taken on life of their own, apart from his and seem to have their own agenda…and it doesn’t include being attached to HIS body. These diabolical hands start communicating with each other and hatch a plan to remove themselves from the doctor’s anatomy.
After suffering a number of attacks upon his person by his hands (that just sounds funny to me) the dear and frightened doctor starts to come a bit unglued. He even seeks the advice of a shrink, telling him that he feels his hands have turned against him. And they really kind of have. The hands (I say THE rather than HIS because it is clear by now that the doc has no control over the appendages) have attacked him while he’s driving and now, they strangle his wife while he is sleeping. He wakes just in time to see it happen but, not in time to save her.
His entire life begins to unravel. He’s starting to lose it, his career is over, he’s been telling his shrink that his hands are conspiring against him, his wife is dead and he is looking like the prime suspect for her murder…life is just really REALLY starting to suck.
And it seems like the hands are trying to ignite some sort of revolution. HANDS EVERYWHERE UNITE!
So, what happens to the doc? And the hands? I’ll let you watch and find out.
I enjoyed this film immensely. Christopher Lloyd is just wacky enough to pull off the Quicksilver character beautifully. The guy that plays Bill in the first story, Raphael Sbarge, I have seen him in a number of things and he’s very good at playing the neurotic jackass. I wonder if they type-cast him. He had a role on a CSI (Vegas) episode as an Actuary (a risk assessment manager) and he ended up being the killer and the guy was one of the biggest jerks ever! He plays it perfectly!!!!
The stories are actually quite good and they both have a little comedy thrown in for balance. I am interested to know how the film versions of these twisted tales stack up against the written ones. I’m sure the written ones are good too, I mean, Stephen King and Clive Barker? I wish I remembered Chattery Teethmore than vaguely.
I think I can safely recommend this flick to any horror lover. It’s not that it’s full of blood splatter and gore, nor is it full of foul language and violence. Yet, to me, it is still a good old fashioned kind of horror movie. And I think real horror fans will get a kick out of it.