The Lockdown...Reopening...

So, it seems that even though infection and death numbers are still rising in my area, the Governor and Mayor have decided to participate in what they are referring to as “a soft re-opening” and starting to loosen the stay in place restraints, with some caveats, keep that in mind.
 
Very soon local businesses will be re-opening, some even started this week on Monday, provided that they follow certain directives from the incredible powers that be that have obviously done a banner job in the fight against this pandemic so far…seeing as how we are the one country that has the highest death tolls…which are still rising.
 
Trump is always wanting to be the best at something…well, I guess killing off part of the voting population COULD work in his favor, in some sicko warped tangerine Teflon tyrant driven fantasy.  
 

Personally, I’ve been very confused as to why Trump hasn’t gotten this virus that he says is no big deal.  He has exposed himself to diplomatic leaders that have been exposed, multiple situations where he is exposed, and samples at the CDC and other people who have tested positive and yet, somehow, this man that cannot possibly be “in perfect health” as his medical personnel said after his last physical, isn’t getting this virus.
 
It took me all night to figure out why.  And then suddenly, it hit me like a bucket of bad spray tan.  I realized that Trump has always had this incredibly orange Oompa Loompa cheap ass type spray tan and I started thinking…maybe it’s in the tan.  That is why I call him a tangerine tyrant or tangerine Teflon tyrant.  I think that it’s possible the spray tan is acting as some sort of shield on his skin, not allowing the virus to penetrate his body.  I could be wrong.  He could be drinking bleach and bombarding himself with UV rays in a tanning bed.  
 
I tell you what though, if it IS the spray tan, I’ll rock that Oompa Loompa look to the friggin’ hilt.  I’ll be sporting the little white gloves and the little boots with the puffballs on them.  The overalls.  Shamrock green hair with the 50s curls on the sides…I’m totally down.

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​Sometimes I wonder if Trump is like the giant version of an Oompa Loompa.  I mean he has the tiny hands, the orange skin, the round beefy look…is it possible that instead of what Bill Maher thought was an Orangutan has turned out to be an overgrown chocolate worker for Willy Wonka.  Probably got fired at Wonka’s at is disgruntled now.  I’m sure there’s some sort of height requirement/limit at Wonka’s and Trump, frankly, just got too tall.  
 
But he kept the tan.  And he still has tiny hands.  I’m still thinking there’s something in the tan that is acting as a shield.  What would truly be ironical is, if during all this time he’s telling his staff not to wear masks and there’s not a threat, it’s gonna go away, wonk wonk wonk, he was actually an A-symptomatic carrier and spreader.  What I expect will happen is that he will eventually get this virus that he thinks he’s winning a competition with and then because all he does is hang out at Mar-a-Lago and Camp David and play golf and eat KFC, that he’ll need a ventilator, a respirator, PPE, a hospital bed and treatment and he’s gonna be laying there on a ventilator, machines doing everything for him and he’ll be all alone, just like the rest of the over 80,000 people we’ve lost in this country.  He can spend all that time talking to his family via Twitter.  He can say his final words via selfie video, talking about how we prevailed in the fight against a virus that is now so prevalent and has been through so many people it’s mutating that it will be with us forever.  Like HIV and AIDS.  He’ll turn pale and thin, because they don’t serve hospital patients KFC and they don’t usually allow for spray tanning while death imminent.  But he won’t die.  He’ll just get his large tang colored ass whipped to the point he can’t think straight.  Then maybe he’ll finally start making some sense.  
 
On the other hand, maybe he’s drinking like bleach water or something.  Now, of course his kidneys and liver would eventually start failing, which could be the reason for that heavy orange tan…liver failure often causes jaundice in patients.  But he’s got the iconic and tell-tale racoon tan eyes from those tiny tan goggles they give you.
 
So, is it the tan protecting him?  Is this some sort of super smart virus that actually deploys tactical theory and looks at Trump and says, “yeah, you can’t fix stupid, he’ll kill himself before we can…moving on…”?  Anyone who looks at the man can clearly see he’s not in good health and that means he’s at a higher risk for serious complications if he catches the virus.  Melania will be okay because she barely touches him anymore, if y’all hadn’t noticed.  They don’t hold hands; she doesn’t appear at everything and this stuff started before COVID-19.  I think she’s repulsed by him personally but, I’m not an expert in body language, I’ve just read a lot on the subject.
 

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Anyways, out here in the Midwest it’s almost like the area that time forgot.  Over 50% of our small businesses are going bankrupt.  We haven’t seen the giant uptick in unemployment just yet, but also consider that here in the Midwest, we haven’t been totally hit by the virus yet.  We haven’t even begun to see numbers like the coasts.  But my metro area is of major concern and the people involved in the fight against this virus are watching our numbers as we do this soft re-opening crap.  I don’t know if it’s gonna work the way they think it will, but medical pros say we shouldn’t open back up yet.  Out here we haven’t even gotten the REAL first wave yet. You have to understand, here in the Midwest, we’re always a few steps behind.  Something new comes out on the coasts in fashion, we don’t get it here for at least a year, sometimes longer.  
 
This isn’t a high traffic vacation spot, there’s not really anything to see here that you can’t see in any other Metro.  So, we don’t get the same levels of things and such like the coasts do at the rate that they do.  It takes longer.  Plus, we are more spread out here, there’s more rural areas and small cities that keep to themselves.  
 
For instance, in reference to body language, the more populated the area, the less amount of personal space is required.  So, in places like China, they are so heavily populated that they require somewhere around only 12 inches of personal space.  In general, the US population requires somewhere between 2-6 feet of personal space.  In the big cities, it’s more like two or three feet.  In the more spread out and rural areas, they require more like 3-6 feet.  Which is why you don’t see a lot of rural folk shake hands but they do a hell of a lot of waving.  And different kinds of waves to mean different things.  It’s very common where my family is originally from for a person driving down the road to raise their index and middle finger in a two-finger wave like gesture as others drive by in the opposite direction.  Rural people usually don’t go fast and aren’t in a hurry.  But that two-finger wave, usually using the hand that’s on the steering wheel, is a sign of respect to your neighbor and fellow man.
 
Where I live, we hold doors for people, we say thank you and please, you’re welcome, regular politeness. When I lived in California, if I held the door open for someone at a gas station or something, they looked at me like I just ran over their dog or flattened all their tires.  Drive thrus here say stuff like, “Hi welcome to (restaurant), what can I get started for you today or may I take your order?”  In California…” Can I help you!?” as if you somehow going through their drive thru and making them earn their paycheck is exploitative and offensive to them.  And they CHOOSE to work there.  I didn’t tell you to go work at Popeye’s or Church’s or McD’s.  Why you pissed at me?  I’m helping pay your salary, ya ass.
 
But now, nobody here can really afford to eat take out like we did three months ago.  Here in the Midwest there are a lot of service workers, blue collar workers.  With everything shut down and going out of business, nobody has any money to go out to eat.  They are worried about paying mortgage payments and stuff like that because again, like I said, we haven’t even begun the curve in this area of the country, let alone flatten it.  People have been out of work for months now, schools are considering not reopening in the fall, there’s no money here.  There’s no money for groceries or rent or car notes or cell bills or utilities or gas or anything…least of all going to a restaurant where they only seat every other table, you have no clue what is going on in the kitchen and you have to trust the word of a desperate business owner struggling to stay above water that they are taking EVERY precaution and following EVERY directive from the CDC and WHO. 
 
We live in the 21st century people.  Clearly a new age.  We have proven to each other that we no longer function in this country as a society of one comprised of a people of many.  Now, it’s every person for themselves.  Nobody cares that you’re out of work when they too are out of work.  The person sitting next to you at the job interview truly doesn’t want you to get the job, even if you are more qualified.  Nobody cares that you are a new mother with an infant that NEEDS baby wipes.  They now need them MORE than your infant because they sanitize.  And there was a shortage of toilet paper for a quick minute.  And I do mean quick.  Like a week.  So, all those people went and spent all that money on toilet paper and paper towels, and now the shelves are stocked and they are unemployed and wish they had some of that money back.
 
Unfortunately for them, the government is keeping tabs on people who are selling essential items for outrageous profit.  So now they are stuck like Chuck with all this stuff they don’t need right now and can’t get rid of for profit.  Yes, I know they’ll use it eventually but, you’re not going to need much toilet paper or paper towels if you aren’t able to buy food and eat.  Not forward thinkers.
The truth is, things are only going to get worse.  It’s gonna be a long while before we all pull out of this, and it’s a virus that will be with us forever, like I said, like HIV or the flu.  
 
The reason things will get worse is because apparently Trump never took a single Econ (economics) class in school ever.  And no, taking it at Trump University does NOT count.
 
It doesn’t matter if you reopen the country if half your work force is infected, sick or dead.  It doesn’t matter if you open the businesses if they can’t afford people to work there.  It doesn’t matter if businesses are open if nobody has any money to go spend.
 
And it certainly doesn’t matter if you PROMISE to take precautions.  This is a virus.  You can’t stop this one.  It doesn’t infect, move, react, behave in any way like regular viruses that have been eradicated through vaccines or antibodies.
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Eventually, pandemics die out in one of two ways.  Either medically, by creating vaccines and such or by the human race getting beyond the fear and learning to live with the virus in existence.  The first is self-explanatory.  The second is more like people just decide to start living their lives again, no matter what they are told about the risks.  It’s very difficult to keep people cooped up when they are used to exercising their constitutional rights as a part of daily life.  You start stripping those rights away and Americans will take it for a while but eventually, they have to break free.  We aren’t used to the government telling us we can’t leave our house, can’t go to retail stores, can’t carry on trials in the justice system in a timely manner, can’t function as a regular nation, as free human beings with our inalienable rights guaranteed by two documents we hold very sacred in this country, we don’t like being told we can’t do something or can’t go somewhere.
 
Now, that may be our arrogance, if you wish to call it that.  But as Americans, we expect certain things we KNOW are guaranteed, afforded to us by those who founded this country and those who believe in what it REALLY means to be an American.  The freedom of choice…choice of everything.
 
And it’s making people around here in the Heartland a little antsy.  There’s no other way to describe it.  And again, we haven’t even truly been hit by this virus yet.  
 
One can only speculate how bad this is actually going to get.  I foresee a new Great Depression worse than anything we’ve seen before.  I expect by the time this is all over, we will have lost 10-25% of our population here in the States.  It took them ten years to figure out the HIV/AIDS epidemic and get it under control.  And this, this is worse, more contagious, just as lethal, can re-infect previously infected, spread is almost impossible to control and we are only barely six months in on this epidemic.
 
Who knows how bad this will get before we get a handle on it.
 
So, stay home.  Stay safe.  And thanks for reading!

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